Saturday, July 4, 2009

Long pause.

"I had this feeling today that Mom was going to come home early today."


"I made Maggi then and made it the way he does. It was brilliant..."



"Maybe they should invent something different for the rains."



"you know I figured that singing really is not my thing. not at all. psssh."



Long Pause.




"They said gay sex was all okay now. Wise I say. It's just so annoying that we want to fight all the time. "


"I wanted to kill that bitch of a person today you know. I don't even want to take names. Irritating people are at times..."




Pause.




" I figured I should've left from there."



"That boy is just very lecherous and uncivilized"



"If he ever makes me feel like that again, I will kill him."


Pause.


"Actually, I did kill him. Why lie to you?"



Long pause.



"So then, this bhajiwala wouldn't budge only! 45 rupees for french beans?!"



"I met Mom at home then. I knew she would be home."



"On my way here, I splashed water at me......"




She looked up again. It started drizzling for an answer maybe.
She didnt move from the spot she was sitting. It was comforting.
The Sky always listens.

Friday, July 3, 2009

That's that.

"Pudhil station, Kandivli"
"Agla Station, Kandivli"
"Next station, Kandivli"

This is when I regained consciousness of my surroundings. This lady was trying to get in between me and this other lady near the door to well, get wet. It was raining very faintly and I was wondering back to what I was thinking about. I'd lost track from Andheri to Kandivli. I think its very unwise to do that in a train. Really. You just never know. Today I saw two movies, White and Red. It just made me realize what emotions and relationships mean to some people. How easy it is to hurt, to love, to cheat, to feel guilty. And how hard it is to get over it.

I wish I had such transparent eyes. That says everything, but nothing. They are just actors and it still puts that effect on me.
I made Maggi for me when I came back, had some tea. But the stupid headache wouldn't go. It's weird when it gets all needy and clingy. The need to hug. The need for someone to say that they love you no matter what. The loneliness just gets you I guess sometimes. Even though there is no question for you to feel that way.
It's so hypocritical, that I wanted to be left alone but still wanted some reassurance, something that I could hold onto. Plus, I didn't want doobies help. It's not good for such feeling of sadness really.
So I'm just here. Home. Feeling really pathetic. And I have no idea why.
That's that.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

So Kiss me...

There was this song I loved when I was small. The video would keep coming on Channel V and I would always imagine my first kiss to be something like this song. Really. The song is from Sixpence none the richer- kiss me. yeah. I don't know, but I still love this song. :)

Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.