Saturday, November 29, 2008

pakda pakdi

It's more of a thought than a question, "does anyone really care about me?". or prolly just an apparent ask of desperate affection or love. everybody thinks about this at some point in thier life. everytime we played "pakda pakdi" i always wanted my friends to catch me first.
it was an innate feeling. i wanted them to like me, be nice to me, say good things about me..always wanted some guy to have a crush on me, hate a girl and not have her hate me back. prolly try to be the miss goody-two-shoes. but then i learnt, that this, is bullshit.
coz however goody goody you are, you're always gona be evil. like "always".
its more of a reflex than a emotion. being evil that is.
i do get jealous.
i do make mistakes and hide behind the sheets.
i do cry.
i do sin.
i do react.
i do get angry.
i do
i do.

when the world hates you
and you hate it back
when you wish you were a pigeon
with the wings that you lack
a feeling of love
a feeling of sanctity
am i too desperate to ask for it?

Thursday, November 27, 2008

what is wrong with the world?

I mean is this some kind of a joke? killing 101 people (statistically, we never know how many are actually killed), and firing at innocent passengers and claiming to be some wierd hydrebadi stuntmen burning up hotels and holding hostages? What is wrong with the world? I mean, they actually sieze police cars and go about shooting people and we lose our best men, with 200 commandos sent from delhi and I dont know what not. While the bloody state govt officer says "yeh rajya govt ka maamla hai, law and order, hamaara nahi, par help agar maange toh hum denge". One would actually "ask" for help at such situations? What is with these guys? Where are all the activists now? Where are all the "oh-lets-burn-things-this-is-fun" people?
arent they aware? Or will we just see them burning effigies and buses two days later against some another community?

This is absolutely disgusting. killing people, terrorising them, just for some goddamned wants of thiers. with these TV reporters hyping everything in sight, showing the same horrible scenes again and again, getting thier cameramen shot, yelling on top of thier voices talking to bloody good-for-nothing politicians!

madness this is, just utter madness.
die you mongrels! die!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Yes, Im eighteen.

I had the most amazing day of my life today. lavita is amazing. believe me. so is malyaj, niku and reeti and chirag and all the endless people i love who showed up today. miss singhania here planned all with my sister and my friends and bought them home for my bday. My sis actually cooked the entire lunch for 15 people. and it turned out amazing. she baked two amazingly delicious cakes. everyone actually enjoyed and made themselves as comfortable as they could :P

i shopped crazy for these crazy people where i'd expected just 5 of them to be there and instead there were 15 of them!! haah. i had such suprises today! plus it was an entirely wierd experience with 5 guys lifting me and throwing me literally 18 times on the floor!!
ahh! that hurt, with anku being a part of it!! :(

i had an amazing cake with awesome manchurian balls! (not in combination though, coz thats just gross! ew! ) with so much to drink though it got all over in an hour! those hogs!
ah, it was one nice party though.
loved every bit. im gona get nostalgic about it real soon. :(

Sunday, November 23, 2008

So tomorrows no big day, just that i turn 18.

yes, thats it. thats all i want to say. in about two hours, i turn eighteen.